An Englishman in America

I recently began a very, VERY exciting new chapter in my life - my voice acting career has taken me from England to the USA. I am having a lot of fun so far and though TV and movies have taught me well, there is still a lot about America that I have to learn and figure out. Now based in the United States, with today marking one week since I flew out here to Los Angeles and tomorrow being Independence Day, I thought I would take a humorous look at all the questions I have about this great country.

SOME GENERAL DIFFERENCES

  • From what I can tell, checks work differently over here in America than back in England but I have no idea how yet.
  • Do I have to measure everything in cups now?
  • How about measuring in feet and yards?
  • Please forgive me if it takes me a little while to get tipping correct. There is a huge art and science to it.
  • If someone says "100 degrees" I am going to think that means water is at a boiling temperature, not a tepid/warm one.
  • Do I have to care about college level sports now? Or may I resume to like just the professional level stuff?
  • Do kids ever dissect frogs in school in America or is that just something I've seen in cartoons.
  • Do I need to start enjoying eating sweet and savory foods at the same time?

SPELLING AND WORDS

  • Going back to checks, may I please still spell them as "cheques"? The Q thing looks so classy!
  • Can I still add a "u" after an "o" in certain words such as "colour"? Again, I feel often there's a gentle elegance to it.
  • Please can I keep referring to mathematics as "maths"? I think it is technically and grammatically correct.
  • Please forgive my reluctance to call it "soccer" for it is the immensely popular global sport where you actually kick the ball around to move it.
  • Can I still spell "tyre" with a "y"? Then I'll know you mean a wheel and aren't sleepy.
  • I'm more than happy to spell "gray" with an "a" as that always made way more sense to me than using an "e".
  • If I use the phrase "the war" will people know I mean WWII or will I just confuse people?

NAUGHTY MISUNDERSTANDINGS

  • If you talk about wearing no pants, I am going to gasp while I initially think you are naked from the waist downwards.
  • If I hear someone say "fanny" I will likely gasp and think you are talking about something much ruder...
  • If you do the peace sign but show me the back of your hand, I will think you are swearing at me.
  • Some Americans say the word "horror" in such a way that I may gasp and think you said something much worse...

I HAVE NO IDEA...

  • What on earth is "March Madness"?
  • What is a Klondike?
  • I'm going to need to learn what candy corn is, aren't I?
  • ... and taffy too, right?
  • I have no idea how milk and flour works over here. There is an entirely different system when describing the different types of milk and flour. Lots of foods and cooking items are named differently here but milk and flour will be my main stumbling blocks I'm sure.

AND FINALLY...

  • The water in toilets comes up so high.
  • Ceiling fans kind of terrify me a little.
  • Please forgive me if I don't get Halloween right the first time.
Posted on July 3, 2018 and filed under Life.